Your silly attempt to sleep is futile, you see...
(Humor, 1372 views) - 11/16/03
(recorded 11/16/03 @ 2:14:23 PM)
I just woke up. Go ahead and check the little musing timestamp in the upper right hand corner. *disillusioned waits.
Yeah, I just woke up. I couldn't get to sleep last night, mostly because I a) didn't take any melatonin, and b) had woke up at around 2:00 pm the day before, and thusly, my body refused to convince itself that it was sleepy-time. Here's what transpired:
Me: "Hey- you've got church at 10:30 tomorrow. It's just passed 5:00 in the *morning*! Go to sleep!"
My brain: "Whoa, whoaa there buddy... It's not *my* fault you couldn't finish with your emailing and letter writing and word gaming and all that other stupid stuff you do before you go to bed a little earlier than 5:00. Similarly, it's not my fault we were asleep until the sun was nearly ready to go down again *earlier* today!"
Me: "It was *two o'clock*! It was..."
(My brain at this point has taken to holding its hands over its ears and attempting to sing, surely a weird sight for any passers by)
Me: "But... I've got to handle the words for the songs at church tomorrow...."
Brain: "Nope, ya don't. You asked Luke to cover that, remember? Ha! I *knew* you didn't want to go to bed on time tonight... Otherwise, your subconscious over there wouldn't have taken such great lengths to organize this, this dodging of responsibility..."
(He gestures towards a shadowy figure, propped against a far-too-stereotypical brick wall, with his head. The figure, whom I know vaguely only as the manifestation of my subconscious simply tipped the brim of his hat towards my brain, himself shrouded in a smoky haze. This was far too surreal.)
Me: "So, what? What do we do here, then?"
My brain started jumping around on a mental trampoline, like a six-year-old who had consumed far too much cola and cotton candy.
Me: "You know what? This is just insane. I'm done."
I proceeded to lay back down and just sit there.
Brain: "Fine, but you know I'm not going to let you traverse that path into sweet, sweet slumber... lalalalalalalaaaaa"
Me: "You remember when we watched Pi? You remember that? Don't *make* me get the drill! I swear...!"
Brain: *sigh* "Idle threats and you know it. Your threshold for pain is remarkably low, and I pity you. Plus, I assure you that anything you tried to do to me would be felt tenfold in every other part of you. Yeah, you heard me. You've made your bed, now lie in it..."
At this point, he started to laugh, almost maniacally, as if his ironic pun was just *so* great. What a dick.
Me: "Fine. Whatever."
And so there we laid for about an hour and a half, until seemingly, he forgot his little sub-mission to keep me awake, and we drifted to a calm, serene state of sleeping bliss...
Previous musing: Most beautiful, serene
Next musing: Abandon ship now...
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